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But too few businesses (especially startups that get sold) are allowed to do that; their management requires they either shoot the moon or burn up trying.

In particular, I think there is a solid niche for an OKC-like dating site that actively rejects "mobile first" low-word-count design in favor of the desktop (check your messages when you get home, no "swiping" from the shitter, etc.), emphasizes profiles with lots of information and underlying data to construct matches on something other than photos, and basically serves a very literate demographic. Though today, a modern version would also need tools to aggressively block users that are abusive or just plain "creepy", because there's an Eternal September aspect to the Internet today that didn't really exist back then, that you'd need to combat -- spam-type adaptive filters would probably do the job ('is this spam' is a pretty vague question for a machine, so is 'is this creepy', but you could teach the filters over time given a good dataset and feedback mechanism). For many/most people, there's not a strict binary division.

(Hell, even if you weren't necessarily interested in, or comfortable with the idea of, "online dating", the extensive quizzes were a great signup engine.)When the founders sold to Match, and presumably also got less involved in the day-to-day, suddenly I stopped hearing anything good about it anymore.

I can't personally vouch for it, being out of the market at the time, but it went from being a pretty reliable recommendation that I'd often hear friends talking about, to quickly developing a reputation for having a high creep factor, lots of low-effort and fake profiles, etc.

It means actually having to grow as a person, but I would bet on a higher success rate than with any dating app/website. Bumble is hilarious because it actually makes an existing problem worse and sells that as a solution; women don't want hundreds of messages from random penises, and they're very unlikely to initiate a conversation.(i don't blame them) Match, Chemistry, Po F, and all those old-school sites are borderline scams that charge a fortune.

They like to hide that fact and pretend they're all separate entities to end users, but it's true.

Some of them were once separate, then purchased later, but Tinder was part of them from the very beginning.

Also, and this is the more obvious thing, I think, is that a dating platform designed to not require you to actually read a profile before deciding if you're interested isn't going to be the ideal place for stating "preferences".

Hence, my anecdotal experience."The only alternative I can recommend is real life.

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